Fluctuation Expectation

I’m really sick and this all or nothing bullshit. This morning I asked myself why I got EVERYTHING I wanted before. It was because of confidence and narcissism. People may hate me for admitting that, may think I was a spoiled brat. But hey I don’t care anymore. I didn’t get all the materials I want…I just remember how there wasn’t one situation where I didn’t know how to manipulate the event. Thus, with all this stress of finals and choosing a major and commiting to it. I realized I want to take up psychology, I’ve always been interested in the brain…and with the right training, one can cure oneself from minor health issues, as well as business. Although I have a hippie mindset..I’m smart enough not to let that control me. I’ve been reading Harvard bussiness journals, investopedia and forbes on the daily. I don’t really know what to do with bussines per ay but I’m thinking more of the marketing side.  I know, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and all and I was fixed on nursing while choosing my classes…but really…I don’t want the battle to be different than my family to lose. I can’t stop now. Plus, manipulating event releases all the good hormones in my brain. I’m so intuitive with my body. Especially when I do yoga…and there’s just a hint of fear that I won’t do well in nursing just because I was against it my whole life. Seriously, and reading all these bussiness articles would somewhat go to waste. I’ve learned to open myself up to other ways of living, believing, cultures, food, etc. I’ve also been into conspiracies lately. But those who actually stray from the government and act like hippies never really get to be on top of the human food chain. Wow, I just came up with that right now..Well anyway, life is a game, money is how one keeps score. I don’t intend to buy an island..I jut want my worries to cease.

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