Hang On,

To exist or to take my own life-that is the issue at stake./To choose between a tragedy I have created myself/Of Which slowly eats me away until I turn to dust/Or be my own shield in times of tribulation, To rest, or to rest/I long for this to end/I long for the fluctuations of emotions to cease and thus set me free/I long for my soul to be solaced, Oh what a shame…/Yet in trying to obtain the right frame of mind, I still yearn to rest./To cease my existence-would take no effect on others/Perhaps, they would live in peace for the black sheep no longer is bringing them down/I have been waiting, waiting for my soul to be set free/Yet nothing has came to be/I constantly preach that we are connected and in ways the system of society provides a function. Yet we need to be knowledgable enough to manipulate that system./I only want to rid myself of these awful feelings./Yet every time I emphasize my dopamine levels something wrong always happens./I don’t want to lie to myself any longer./I don’t want to hurt my mother any longer. I was such a horrible daughter./To only realize the pain in her heart now../I yearned to have the will power to end this all yet I can never bring myself to do so…/I envy those who do.

 

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